How To Bring Enthusiasm & Passion Back To Your Marriage
I know a secret that sabotages sex lives around the world…including mine and yours.
And in this video I’m going to clearly explain what it is.
Then I’m going to tell you why it happens, what you must stop doing today and start doing tomorrow.
Bottom line: This is all about THOUGHT CONTROL
Early on in your relationship your thoughts were all good, healthy, loving, attractive and very sexy. Therefore, the way you looked, walked and talked supported the undeniable truth that you were a good, healthy, loving, attractive and sexy man.
And the sex was good. Intimacy was easy. Closeness was taken for granted. She couldn’t get enough of you and couldn’t stop bragging about you.
Then…things changed. Your circumstances changed and your THOUGHTS changed.
Then what?
Then you started worrying. You got frustrated, angry, disappointed and critical. These negative thoughts were immediately broadcasted for all to see and feel through your face, your body and your voice.
This is one of the biggest reasons why she doesn’t want sex. And you actually have total control over it!
I explain more here. (I also give a surprise hi-tech demo in this video)
Leading your relationship requires changing the way you think about each other, so you can change the way you feel about each other. Leading by example first and giving her something to follow.
I already know your objections.
I had the same ones.
“But what about HER thoughts?! All I read on her face is disappointment, disgust and rejection. She wants nothing to do with me. I think she must hate me.”
Back to my horse analogy, brother.
The horse will ALWAYS project that crap when it experiences it from you first. When a horse feels fear and uncertainty it will always move away with a disgusted look.
And when the horse is seeing fear and uncertainty in the person pursuing her…her fears are validated. She sees unpredictability, inconsistency and anger. She would be stupid to say, “Hey there, cowboy, climb aboard!”
And she’s not stupid.
What next?
Next is you deciding whether or not you are going to change your thoughts and what you’re broadcasting.
You’ll need to decide to do it because it’s not negotiable for you. You’ll do it for YOU first…because of how you feel about YOU when you get back to that happy, confident, attractive guy with the sexy swagger.
With proper commitment to these changes and unwavering consistency I will guarantee you that your mojo will soar.
And, yes, she will notice.
It’s from there things can start changing in the romance and sex department.
Below are some options for you to get started right away…
Free: If you’re serious about building your masculine mojo then apply for a coaching call with us we will help you identify what to focus on and what to avoid to get you feeling confident again.
What do I mean by “SERIOUS”?
- We take YOU and your struggles seriously…because we’ve been there
- We know living in a sexless marriage is serious…and so is showing your kids what a healthy affectionate relationship looks like
- A lack of intimacy of all kinds is serious now and for the long term health of your marriage
- We believe your personal emotional strength and well-being is serious
- We seriously show up 110% to our conversations with you and expect you to be as serious as we are about changing your life
Free Guide: Where You Should Focus To Grow Your Masculinity
$69 Monthly Subscription: Join Dan and I in our Men’s Roundtable Group Coaching membership. We meet three times per month for live group coaching and we support you in a powerful group of men facing the same issues you are. Get instant access to 5 years of recorded sessions. Try it for one month. What have you got to lose?
$397 One-Time Payment: How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb is a self-paced course with me, Tim Wade, and a community of men learning how to lead when you’ve just heard, “I love you but I’m not in love with you” or “I want to separate or divorce.”
As Teddy Roosevelt said:
“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”
Q: Why did the passion and intimacy in my marriage fade over time?
A: Because your thoughts changed. In the beginning, your mindset was confident, playful, and full of desire—and she could feel it. Over time, frustration, disappointment, and self-doubt replaced that energy. Those thoughts now broadcast insecurity instead of attraction. Change your thoughts, and your energy (and intimacy) follows.
Q: How can my thoughts really affect her attraction to me?
A: Your thoughts create the emotional frequency you radiate. When you think confidently, your body language, tone, and presence communicate safety and magnetism. But when your mind is full of fear, resentment, or rejection, you project that too—and she naturally pulls away. Attraction starts in your head, not the bedroom.
Q: What if she’s the one who seems cold, distant, or resentful?
A: Don’t chase or blame her. Lead by example. Just like a horse senses fear, she feels your emotional inconsistency. When you become calm, grounded, and predictable again, her nervous system relaxes. That’s when connection—and desire—can return. You can’t control her energy, but you can master your own.
Q: How do I start changing my negative thoughts about her and our marriage?
A: Start by noticing what you’re broadcasting. Are you walking around with a disappointed or defeated energy? Replace those thoughts with grounded truths about who you are—capable, attractive, confident, and worthy of connection. Lead from that mindset, and watch the atmosphere in your relationship shift.
Q: Why is “thought control” the secret to rebuilding sexual attraction?
A: Because sex isn’t just physical—it’s energetic. When your thoughts are full of anxiety or neediness, your presence feels heavy. But when you think like the man who already knows his value, your natural swagger returns. That confident energy is what reignites chemistry and trust in her body.
Q: What’s the first step to getting my mojo and confidence back?
A: Decide that it’s non-negotiable. Do it for you, not to manipulate her. When you rebuild your masculine energy—your calm, confident leadership—she’ll notice. Join our coaching calls or Roundtable group and start rewiring how you think, lead, and connect. The spark comes back when you do.
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Have questions about your relationship?
Apply for a free, no strings, 90 minute deep dive personalized coaching session to help you identify what to focus on and what to avoid to get you moving toward the future you want. We offer a unique form of Men’s Coaching and we attract smart guys who see through surface level hype and bravado. We hide nothing and hold nothing back. We know that everything you want is behind your fear and skepticism…just like it was for us.
