How To Be A More Confident Husband
Want to be a more confident husband? You’re confident at work & socially, but at home it disappears with just a single look, a sigh or a remark from your wife.
Being Crystal Clear About Who You Are
There’s a big problem with “conventional wisdom” like in this great quote:
“If you don’ know where you’re going, you’ll end up someplace else”
Sure, that quote makes sense and even makes you laugh a little at how ridiculously OBVIOUS it is.
The problem is this.
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Being crystal clear about who you are, what you want and where you’re going is extremely rare.
The first thing we talk about with men in our courses, retreats and personal coaching programs is VALUES. Call them values, operating principles, commandments, standards, declarations or non-negotiables.
Whatever you call them, every man needs to be clear on his most basic personal expectations he has OF HIMSELF…FOR HIMSELF…and OF THE PEOPLE HE ALLOWS IN HIS LIFE.
Watch this video where I go into each of these areas and give you some examples of how some of my personal principles sound.
The 3 Crucial Questions Most Men Can’t Clearly Answer
A Confident Husband Has Clear Expectations Of Himself
These don’t need to be framed and hung on your wall, but you do need clarity.
What happens to men who are fuzzy about their personal standards and expectations for their own life?
They adopt somebody else’s .
It’s plain and simple and enormously frustrating.
We become chameleons who constantly change our standards and expectations to please others.
We do it for validation and acceptance.
This leads to low-grade anger and resentment which then leads to a drop in confidence and self-respect.
And an angry man is a chronically unhappy man.
Ask me how I know this. ;^)
A Confident Husband Has Clear Standards For Himself
“Men are like steel. When they lose their temper, they lose their worth.” ~ Chuck Norris
That quote by Chuck Norris is an example of a personal standard. It’s clear he values emotional strength and self-control.
It doesn’t have to be complicated. The simpler the better.
Start small.
What is one standard, one personal expectation or meaningful mantra you will claim for yourself?
How will you be conscious and deliberate in the following days in living it?
And how will you make sure you stay clear, consistent and confident in your values?
Get crystal clear about what you expect of yourself, for yourself, and of those you allow into your life. These are your masculine operating principles. A confident husband acts deliberately from this solid frame. Being this kind of man will create the relationships and life you want. Being this kind of man feels amazing!
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Learn From Men Who’ve Walked This Road
The GG2GM coaching programs are powerful and personally challenging.
They are intensely focused on YOU and YOUR THINKING.
There are not for everyone. But they are perfect for the man willing to try something different…something strangely counter-intuitive.
If you’re ready for a powerful and intensely personal conversation about where you want to go, we’re ready. Get a comfy chair and a cup of coffee. This conversation is NOT a “taster session”.
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Fill out the unusually personal questions.
Be honest. Be thorough.
Let us show you something you didn’t expect.
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P.S. Are you impatient? Are you done talking? Want to dive in asap.?
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Q: Why do I feel confident everywhere except at home with my wife?
A: Because at home, you’re not operating from your values—you’re reacting to hers. One sigh or disappointed look throws you off because you’re fuzzy about who you are. A confident husband is grounded in his own standards. When you get clear on your masculine operating principles, her reactions lose their power.
Q: How do I rebuild confidence when I’ve been a people-pleasing chameleon for years?
A: Start by choosing one personal standard and living it every day. Something simple: “I stay calm,” or “I speak truthfully.” When you stop changing who you are for validation, your confidence comes roaring back. Anger and resentment fade because you’re finally living by your rules again.
Q: What personal values matter most for becoming a confident husband?
A: Values that define how you show up under pressure—honesty, calmness, integrity, emotional strength, clear communication. These aren’t slogans; they’re expectations you live by. When you hold yourself to a solid frame, your self-respect rises, and your wife feels safer and more connected around you.
Q: Why do unclear expectations make me lose confidence in my marriage?
A: Because when you’re unclear, you default to pleasing, fixing, and seeking acceptance. That creates low-grade anger and resentment—and an angry man is an unhappy man. Clarity creates stability. Stability creates confidence. And confidence creates attraction and respect.
Q: What’s one practical step I can take today to be a more confident husband?
A: Choose one standard—just one. A mantra, expectation, or non-negotiable. Then commit to living it for the next few days with total consciousness. Confidence grows from consistency. When your behavior matches your values, your self-respect skyrockets.
Q: How do I stay consistent when life gets stressful and my wife pushes my buttons?
A: Slow down. Breathe. Return to your values instead of reacting to hers. Emotional strength and self-control are the hallmarks of a confident husband. The more you act deliberately from your masculine operating principles, the more grounded, respected, and attractive you become.
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