Seven Days to a Better Relationship
This article is about the power of brevity and the power of listening. We men dismiss this but it’s one of the most powerful skills you can develop for more intimacy.
This is NOT about minimizing a woman’s complaints or her endless venting about her day. It’s NOT about how to dismiss people.
It’s about how to have better relationships with virtually everyone.
It’s about learning to RELAX with her. It’s about seeing her.
It’s mostly about listening and accepting her without an anxious need to solve her problem, fix her anger or make her “get to the freakin’ point!”.
This isn’t easy if you’re nervous or insecure.
It’s impossible if you feel anger or resentment.
Watch this first. Laugh along with me. Then read on.
I know…you’re still grinning.
Use that feeling of humor and insight to actually change how you are being.
Here’s an example of how I use this secret power when coaching men.
Seven Days to a Better Relationship…with ANYONE!
Try it for yourself.
I guarantee not only will others FEEL your warm, attentive energy…I guarantee YOU will feel better.
“I understand” is the simple choice to keep listening.
It’s the choice to keep present and connected.
It’s about your curiosity to actually know more. You can also say, ‘Tell me more.”
And it’s about your generous ability to let people talk about themselves and take yourself and your nervous energy out of the spotlight.
And that will feel amazing to both of you.
Try it for SEVEN DAYS with everyone you meet.
Then send me an email to tell me how it went.
How did it feel?
This is one of about 100 steps we teach men on their way to becoming “Mountain Lion” strong.
Cool, calm, confident. Heart beat around 40 bpm.
Unshakeable.
And unfuckwithable.
If you want to learn more about how to be comfortable, confident and peaceful in your own skin, I’d love to help show you the way. Here are 4 options for you to get started today:
Free: Fill out our contact form for your “Unrattled Masculine Mojo” consultation call – it’s a free, no strings, 90 minute deep dive personalized coaching session to help you identify what to focus on and what to avoid to get you moving toward the future you want. We offer a unique form of Men’s Coaching and we attract smart guys who see through surface level hype and “alpha” bravado. We help you be confident in you again.
Free Guide: Where You Should Focus To Grow Your Masculinity
$69 Monthly Subscription: Join Dan and I in our Men’s Roundtable Group Coaching membership. We meet three times per month for live group coaching and we support you in a powerful group of men facing the same issues you are. It’s a $69 investment. You get INSTANT access to 5 years of recorded sessions! Try it for one month. What have you got to lose?
$397 One-Time Payment: How to Defuse the Divorce Bomb is a self-paced course with me, Tim Wade, and a community of men learning how to lead when you’ve just heard, “I love you but I’m not in love with you” or “I want to separate or divorce.”
As Teddy Roosevelt said:
“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”
Q: Why is it so hard to just listen without interrupting or fixing?
A: Because most men equate listening with doing nothing. Our nervous systems hate stillness when someone we love is upset. We want to fix it, solve it, or make it stop. But true listening isn’t passive—it’s leadership through calm presence. When you slow down, breathe, and say, “I understand… tell me more,” you create safety. And that safety is what builds intimacy, not solutions.
Q: What’s the secret behind “I understand”? It sounds too simple.
A: It is simple—and that’s why it’s powerful. “I understand” tells her you’re still there. You’re not defending, debating, or disappearing. It’s the emotional equivalent of a steady hand on her back saying, “You’re safe to keep talking.” It shifts the focus from your anxiety to her experience—and that’s where real connection begins.
Q: How can I stay calm when she’s venting or repeating herself?
A: Think of yourself as the Mountain Lion. Still. Grounded. Heartbeat around 40 bpm. You don’t need to chase every emotional movement. When she vents, don’t take the bait. Listen with curiosity instead of defensiveness. Let her words move through you. When you stop reacting, the storm inside you—and inside her—passes much faster.
Q: What happens if I actually practice this for seven days?
A: You’ll feel lighter, more peaceful, and far more respected. People will feel your energy shift. Your wife, your coworkers, even your kids will sense your calm, steady presence. The more you practice saying “I understand” instead of reacting, the more you’ll notice how magnetic quiet confidence can be. That’s emotional strength in action.
Q: Why does this small change make such a big difference?
A: Because listening isn’t just about hearing—it’s about seeing. When you can truly see someone without rushing to fix, you give them the rare gift of being understood. And when a woman feels understood, affection, trust, and attraction start to return naturally. Brevity and presence—those are your secret weapons for deeper intimacy.
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Have questions about your relationship?
Apply for a free, no strings, 90 minute deep dive personalized coaching session to help you identify what to focus on and what to avoid to get you moving toward the future you want. We offer a unique form of Men’s Coaching and we attract smart guys who see through surface level hype and bravado. We hide nothing and hold nothing back. We know that everything you want is behind your fear and skepticism…just like it was for us.
